BlinkDash

Ashlee Simpson: Now & Then

Ashlee Simpson has undergone quite the makeover.

In the past two years, she’s gone from a semi-cute singer with relatively little talent to a tricked-out, lip-synching, wannabe skank with no redeeming value whatsoever. Defend her all you like, but the case is clear. Without the singing chops or box office appeal of older sister Jessica, Ashlee is attempting to stay in the public eye the only way she can — by changing her appearance every five minutes and generally whoring it out.

The Gossip has already documented the Ashlee Simpson plastic surgery debacle, which she either forgot happened (not impossible given the intelligence level of the Simpson clan) or had the audacity to deny in a recent interview. Now we’ve taken it a step further with a trio of then-and-now comparisons. The results are stunning:

EXHIBIT A: Ashlee Simpson earlier this year (left) vs. Ashlee circa 2004 (right). Sadly for Ash, you can’t have talent surgically implanted.

EXHIBIT B: Ashlee in 2006 once again, vs. her innocent, unaltered 2004 version. Is she trying to become Britney Spears? Give it up!

EXHIBIT C: Ah, how times change. Look at the tramp seen with Jessica just a few months ago, compared to the cute lil’ sis showing her brother-in-law, Nick Lachey, some affection in ’05. Is that even the same person?

THE VERDICT: Ashlee, you are a disgrace. You are worthless, a waste of valuable oxygen. Please cease all “music” projects and disappear from public view. Sincerely, The Gossip.

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Aldo Pusey

Update: 2024-02-13